kayray.org

Last night I remembered I have a vaporizer. Not a humidifier, a vaporizer. I mean, I also have a humidifier but I’m talking about my vaporizer here. It’s a small electric device with a cup in the base, which holds about a 1/4 cup of water and has a heating element in it. Then there’s a flexible plastic cylinder about 4 inches across and 6 inches high leading up from the base, which is flared at the top so you can rest your face on it and have your nose and mouth inside the cylinder.

You switch it on and the heating element boils the water, making steam which you can then inhale.

It is so dangerous in so many ways, I’m shocked it is even allowed to exist. It’s easy to spill boiling water on yourself. It boils dry in about ten minutes, leaving a boiling hot heating element just naked in a plastic housing. The steam WILL scald your face if you don’t adjust the vents properly.

However! I tried it last night hoping it might loosen the phlegm and make my coughing more productive and thus of shorter duration. Well it didn’t do that, my coughs were still unproductive, but it was very effective anyway! I think the steam relaxed my coughing-muscles and stopped the endless ENDLESS coughing spasms after only a few minutes. It was miraculous. I got up and sat on the floor by the bathroom sink for my first try, and after that I took it to bed and set it up on my nightstand. Rather than hold it on my lap (yikes) I leaned over my nightstand to use it, which was uncomfortable enough that I knew I wouldn’t accidentally fall asleep, and I refilled it from my water bottle.

I woke up about 6 times for coughing festivals but Steamy helped them end pretty quickly every time.

And THEN I put on an episode of this amazing bedtime story podcast that a Mastodon friend told me about: Nothing Much Happens Oh my god you guys this podcast is heaven-sent.

Busy minds need a place to rest. If you find yourself struggling to sleep, awake in the middle of the night, or just anxious as you move through the day, these stories can be a soft landing to you, a simple enjoyable way to focus and relax.

So get comfortable and let me tell you a story in which Nothing Much Happens, you feel good and then you fall asleep.

The narrator/author tells gentle stories in which nothing much happens. There’s no plot, no arc, but tons of rich descriptive language to keep my mind busy but not stimulated. (My friend described the podcast as a handrail that keeps your mind from spinning out.) The narrator, Kathryn, has a lovely speaking voice and delivery style. There is no music, no sound effects. Just a calm gentle human telling a calm gentle story. I swear to you I fell asleep before she got halfway through, listening to the same episode every time! (You know when you’re halfway through because at that point she repeats the same story a little slower). Last night’s episode was “Heavy Snow at the Cabin” and I barely remember anything about it, but I have strong images in my mind of a happy dog rushing out to explore the snow, the narrator feeding the dog, and the narrator considering what to make for her own breakfast. And none of it mattered. No crisis, no twists, no conflict, no conversation, nothing fascinating or stimulating. Just peaceful, gentle imagery. I am looking forward to trying a different episode tonight.

I’ve lost my voice entirely. My whole body hurts from coughing so I stayed in bed all day and did just about nothing. Very pleasant. The house cleaning team is coming tomorrow but I’ve decided to have Dave tell them to skip our bedroom, and I’ll just hide in here. Henry will vacuum for us next time he comes over.

Also I slept until 11 this morning! Miraculous!